Hand to Hold's Official Blog: Written by Parents for Parents

{FB Chat} Letting Go of the NICU Guilt

NICU 101 Facebook chat Letting Go go the Guilt Cheryl Milford Hand to Hold

In July we held our latest Facebook chat, featuring special guest Cheryl Milford, Ed.S. Cheryl is an educational psychologist, providing psychological, neurodevelopmental and infant mental health services in neonatal intensive care units and developmental follow-up clinics.

Our chat focused on the guilt that many moms (and dads!) face when they have a child in the NICU, what parents can do to help relieve some of those feelings, and how to find support during this difficult time. Some of the topics this chat covers include:

  • Why is it that parents, especially moms, struggle with NICU guilt so much?
  • What advice could you give NICU moms to help them work through feelings of guilt that they did something to cause their early delivery of NICU stay?
  • What would you say to a preemie parent that feels like they have a different relationship between their preemie and their term children?
  • What are some strategies we can use when these feelings surface? How do you change how you talk to yourself about what has happened?
  • How does one cope with the guilt of having a child in NICU and children at home?
  • How do you prepare to possibly try for another child after having a micro preemie?

See the entire chat here. For more information, check out these two articles Cheryl recently contributed to the blog:


When All Else Fails: A Breastfeeding Story

Lisa Rothman motherhood the first 90 days breastfeeding preemie NICU pumping

Traditional breastfeeding can be fickle if not downright elusive to the mom of a preemie. You may be up to breastfeeding, but your baby may not have the strength to latch on and feed. Thankfully, hospital grade pumps can help moms of preemies bridge … [Continue reading]

Looking Back on Five Years

Drew brand new

This month and next we celebrate 5 years since our twin boys were discharged from the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. I remember each of those days like they were yesterday. We have come such a very long way since those early days of fear and … [Continue reading]

Trust the Process: Breastfeeding Preemie Twins

twin preemies

When it came to breastfeeding my unborn babies, my prediction was "I'd like to; I'll try." It seemed an awfully maternal thing to do, and I wasn't all that confident in my maternal instincts. But when my identical twins were born nine weeks early, … [Continue reading]

A Superhuman Power

preemie blood donation

Blood. It's an essential part of the body, a must-have to survive. It's something I never thought twice about until I gave birth to my triplets. Sure, I lost blood when I accidentally cut myself in the kitchen or when I scraped my knee as a child, … [Continue reading]