Hand to Hold's official blog
Melissa Haber (NY) is mother to Daphne, a surviving identical twin who was born at 27 weeks 4 days, moments after sister Leah passed away. Daphne was in the NICU for five long months, and had open-heart surgery to repair a congenital heart defect when she was six months old. At three years old, she continues to battle kidney disease and other delays related to her prematurity. Daphne is proud to have the greatest big sister in the world, six-year-old Lucy. The family lives outside of New York City. Melissa blogs regularly about life with a former micropreemie, parenting challenges, and loss and grieving. You can also follow her on Twitter.
When my daughter Daphne came home after five months in the NICU, we took her to the first pediatrician appointment not knowing what to expect. After all, she had been followed by just about every kind of specialist in the hospital, and we had a long schedule of appointments with all of them for the [...]
Since my daughter Daphne was born three and a half years ago, I have read hundreds of stories of babies who were born too soon. They are all different, all heartbreaking and many of them share one thing: surprise. A normal pregnancy, nowhere near term, interrupted, lives changed. That is not my prematurity story. As [...]
Our daughter Daphne had a fairly long NICU stay for a 27-weeker, which earned her the chance to spend time with dozens of nurses. In fact, every nurse in the large unit had the honor to care for her at least once. The first few weeks were grueling. She was so sick and needed such [...]
Travel is not something you worry about while your preemie is in the NICU (unless, of course, NICU is far from home and you have to travel back at discharge). Bringing a preemie home, you get educated on germ prevention, hand washing and sanitizing, and keeping the baby away from crowds or even larger gatherings. You hear about Synagis shots, and how RSV may land your baby with fragile lungs back in the hospital. They tell you to limit exposure whenever possible. You get the picture, it’s best to keep the baby in a cocoon. [Read more]
I witnessed the scene countless times during Daphne’s five-month stay: a father entering the NICU for the first time. He approaches the incubator alone, tentatively, blue gown over his clothes. Peeking into the acrylic incubator from a few feet away, he is approached by a doctor with a report on his new baby. His precious [...]
I had a plan. I wanted two children. My first daughter was a winter baby, and after a gloomy postpartum period, I decided my second should come in the spring, so I could be out and about during maternity leave. When Lucy was two and a half I got pregnant, with a due date in late May, according to the plan. Pregnancy symptoms came fast and furious, which I had heard was normal for a second pregnancy. By my first prenatal appointment at seven weeks, I had violent morning sickness and my pants were tight. Within the first few seconds of the ultrasound, the reason became clear: two heartbeats. The doctor smiled and I hyperventilated. My husband, perched on a chair across the dark room, tried to understand what was happening. [Read more]
Hand to Hold is a nonprofit 501(c)3 parent support organization and information and resources provided here do not intend to take the place of the relationship between a patient and personal physician.